Bah humbug

People never cease to amaze me.
The festive season is supposed to be a time of goodwill, a time when we think kindly about others. (Although it would be wonderful if people could do this all year round – the world would be a much nicer place).
So I was horrified to read today that a couple of fathers got into a fight at their children’s nativity play in South Shields. During the brawl one man bit the other man’s finger off and spat it out – yuck!!!
Thankfully the children did not witness this appalling spectacle of blood and gore. The brawlers were carted off to the hospital / police station adding to the festive work load for medics and others.

What a pair of …well, words fail me – feel free to add your own.

Silly season

It must be the effect of the heat because we seem to be in the throws of a belated silly season.
Why - because the government is contemplating increasing the speed limit on motorways to 80 (i.e. most people will do 90) thus scaring the s*** out of us poor nervous lady drivers. There are enough maniacs on the roads and this move will only lead to more accidents and chaos. What about the environment!!!!
I guess the ConDems want people to buy more petrol to boost the economy and don’t give a stuff people’s welfare.

As for the mooted weekly bin collection at great expense – most of us are now heavily into recycling and it seems like an ill-thought out and ridiculous waste of money.

Scary

A piece of space junk is due to hit earth tonight. I hope it does not land on you. Here is another scary thing to ponder over the week end.

Prof Brian Cox explores the possibility that the World may end in 2012 at the end of the Mayan Long Count.




This is really scary - I’m talking about his driving!

Miracles of Life

The reading list for my MA is colossal (as I mentioned in a previous post), but I am diligently working my way through it. So far the books have all been well written, but some, which shall remain nameless, have been a boring and failed to grip my imagination.
For the last two days, however, I have been engrossed in J.G Ballard’s autobiography, Miracles of Life. It deals with his childhood in Shanghai, his experience of a Japanese POW camp, his life as a student, marriage, and becoming a single father after his wife’s death. It is a fascinating insight into the experiences that shaped his novels and short stories and his development as a writer and a human being.
It is stunning and very moving. I’ve just finished reading it and had to have a good cry.

Wee, piss, urine and piddle

Ugghhhhhhhhh…Why do people have to wee all over toilet seats!!!!!

This phenomenon seems to have appeared over the last few years and is becoming an epidemic.
As you can see I am very annoyed about it.
It does not matter where I go in the UK it seems to be a problem everywhere.

What is wrong with people – why are you all doing it – I would be very grateful if someone could explain why we have to put up with this appalling behaviour.

I wish someone would start a protest movement for better standards in communal lavatories.

I bet all you phantom piddlers don’t do this in your own homes!!!!!

Shoddy clothes

Is it just my imagination or is the quality of clothes deteriorating whilst the price is increasing.

Years ago one could purchase items of clothing form a certain high street store that were so robust that they seemed to last forever – now the same establishment produces stuff that fades, bobbles and disintegrates rapidly after purchase.

The fabric that clothes are made from also seems to be thinner and a lot of items are almost ‘see-through’.

Do people prefer a rapid turnover of disintegrating clothes these days?

Are we being exploited by the clothing industry?

Sadly, even buying more expensive items is not a guarantee of longevity – I bought a lovely jumper ‘for best’ and was horrified to see holes appearing in it and the knitting unraveling…. Grrrrrrr

Which character are you?

Good morning dear reader, I hope you are well.

Do you ever find yourself identifying with characters in books?

I’ve empathazised with some very strange characters at times.

When I was working I felt like Boxer from Animal Farm. Boxer’s fate still has the capacity to reduce me to tears when I re read it. Unlike poor Boxer, I’ve escaped and I’m off to pastures new.

When I left my husband my Aunt gave me a copy of The Tenant of Wildfell Hall - it was a great comfort to know I was not alone in the dreadful experience I had been through, and the book helped me make some sense of my own predicament.

Have any fictional characters helped you to make sense of your life?

Are there any characters that you identify with?

Endings

Yesterday was a full moon – a time of endings.
A group of us met in our university coffee shop. It felt like it would be the last time we would all be there together.
It was strange and sad to see the freshers clutching their welcome packs and getting their photos and computer passwords sorted out.
We felt like unwanted old chicks tossed out of the nest to make way for the new ones.
We don’t want this to be the final goodbye so our plan is to set up an informal group for people interested in books and writing. We will meet when we can, jobs and postgrad degrees permitting, in our university town to discuss things that we have read and support each other with our writing.
We still need to identify a venue that serves coffee and caters for groups of literary enthusiasts.

Happy Birthday to me

It is my birthday again and it is probably the saddest day in the year to have a birthday. I’ve not felt like celebrating since 9/11 but today I’m being dragged out for lunch by my parents and children.

My birthday wish for me is that one day I will write something worth publishing – sadly I’ve had no success so far with short story competitions – but I’m not going to give up.


I wish you all a happy year and may your dreams come true.

Valete Omnes

It was my graduation yesterday and it was one of the happiest days of my life. My family came to watch my two minutes of fame and my short-lived career on the stage.
I was very lucky to study at Wolverhampton University and I cannot recommend it highly enough. It is the most student- friendly and nurturing university in the UK and has the best and most inspiring lecturers.
(I can say this with the benefit of having a previous degree in an unrelated subject form a red-brick Russell group institution where the lectures were boring and nobody gave a s*** about the students).
The learning experience at Wolverhampton was brilliant and the university deserves to be rewarded and acknowledged for the good work it does.
Positions on league tables and ‘prestigiousness’ do not necessarily mean ‘better’ in my opinion.

A good time was had by all

A group of us went to Candi’s book launch last night and we had a great time. Candi looked stunning in a slinky dress and high heels. She read from her new novel Kalahari Passage and told us about the research she had undertaken in Africa.
The venue was Waterstone’s in New Street, Birmingham. The book displays had been cleared away in the front entrance and replaced by rows of chairs. The shop has a beautiful ceiling with a stained glass roof, which I had never noticed before.
We queued to get our copies signed and Candi wrote individual things for each of us that we shall treasure.
I began reading my copy on the train home and nearly missed my stop because I was so engrossed.

Candi’s book launch

Just to let you all know, Tindal Street Press is hosting a book launch for Candi Miller’s latest book, Kalahari Passage.


It is taking place at Waterstone’s book shop, 128 New Street , Birmingham at 7pm, on Thursday, 1st of September.

If you would like to go along please could you contact Rikhi Ubhi on 0121 773 8157.

Or e-mail Rikhi - rikhi@tindalstreet.co.uk


http://www.tindalstreet.co.uk/events/the-launch-of-kalahari-passage

Obesity

I read an article the other day that said that women’s’ waistlines were now on average 6 inches bigger than in the 1950s. I can well believe that is true - If you watch films from the post-war era people looked a lot shorter and thinner than they do now. This was because the population had suffered communal food deprivation. The effects of rationing meant that people did not have a lot to eat and fat and sugar were rare treats.

We now have abundance and easy access to tasty food in mammoth quantities. The result is that we have become a nation of gluttons, encouraged by the food industry and supermarkets. If people were suffering rationing now there would not be an obesity epidemic – so it is all down to availability and portions sizes.

Helping people not to become obese is a challenge. I think that there needs to be a radical shift in society to make the food industry downsize our ‘portions’ and offer realistic ones rather than jumbo supersize things. (I bet George Osborne would love to levy a ‘fat’ tax on people who are overweight – he could rake in millions).
Smaller plates and bowls might help.
So might education in schools - teaching children how to cook proper food and not rely on microwave convenience food and the chip shop.

Yes – I’m a glutton too and guilty of living to eat, so I sympathize with anyone who loves food too much and has an expanding waste line.

What do you think – should people be allowed to get fatter and fatter?
Is obesity a matter of our own personal responsibility?
Or do we need a radical shift as a society in our attitude to food?

Dilemma

I’ve spent the last few weeks grappling with the concept of what constitutes a good short story. This is in preparation for my forthcoming MA as short stories seem to be a major component of the modules I’ve chosen.


I’m still bogged down by the mammoth reading list and finding some of the short stories challenging to say the least because they are not the sort of thing I enjoy or would read by choice. (I prefer to read light-weight chick lit and escapist stuff with happy endings and my writing style probably reflects my innate superficial proclivities).

Jackie Kay said in Mslexia that the best short stories should be ‘unnerving’ – but at this stage in my writing career I can’t say that I am drawn to ‘the unnerving’ and I’m still suffering the toxic after-effects of William Burroughs’s psychotic snippets in Naked Lunch.

Do you agree with Jackie Kay - should short stories be unnerving?

What do you think a ‘good’ short story should be like??

What is your favourite short story and why???

In my research on the subject of short stories I came across these suggestions on the link below – and you can access the podcasts too.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2011/dec/11/writers-pick-favourite-short-stories

Rail fares

Just to add to our general misery, there are plans to increase rail fares. How will we ever have a decent public transport system and get cars off the roads if the average person cannot afford to travel by rail?

I was in Belgium recently and was impressed by the clean, frequent and cheap bus service. Their rail service was also exemplary – the trains were clean and on time, and there were plenty of seats for everybody. So why have we in the UK got to put up with over-priced, overcrowded, dirty trains with stinking bogs occupied by a constant stream of fare dodgers. Our trains can never be guaranteed to run on time because of the thousand and one excuses that are trotted out like 'cows on the line' or 'signalling failure'.

If you are fed up with all this then there is a petition you can sign – link below, and there will also be a rally on Tuesday morning 16th August in London out side Waterloo station.



http://www.fairfaresnow.org.uk/petition.

What can society do?

People are asking themselves what has gone wrong with our society to spark the riots we have seen over the past few days.
I was horrified by the total callousness of these 'rioters' who stole from an injured man and left him there. They reminded me of the worst type of school bully -  showing no compassion for others and swaggering off with their cronies. What has caused their lack of morals and compassion?

Do these people come from homes where parents have abused or neglected them, and this is all they know – or are they just psychopaths?
What can be done to stop the rot??

Any suggestions???

Progress report

I’ve made a start on the reading list for my MA, having had a massive cull to make space for the 80+ books I’ve ordered. I’m a very slow reader (because I like to linger over words – no, I’m really a bit thick and I have to read slowly to make sure I’ve grasped the gist of things). Also, I’ve had to shelve any delusions about writing novel number two this holiday because of the frightening volume of reading I need to do.

It is my own fault – I got side tracked by Mr. Wroe’s Virgins and Angela Carter’s Bloody Chamber and I’m looking longingly at Neil Gaiman’s oeuvres that I would rather be reading.

I have read three and a half books so far. I enjoyed James Kelman’s gritty Scottish Selected Stories, and Helen Simpson’s Hey Yeah Right Get a Life. I struggled with Jim Crace’s Quarantine – it was well written, but I found it unsettling because its content thwarted my assumptions and was unpleasant in parts – I won’t spoil the ending in case anyone plans to read it.

The best one so far is Tim Winton’s The Turning – it is excellent. His writing is superb, precise and concise, his characters are compelling and the setting (Perth, Australia) is wonderful.

I’m impressed with the reading list so far.

Violence

I was shocked to learn today that one of my childhood heroes has become a violent thug. The villain in question threw a pizza at Paul Daniels.

Paul Daniels ended up being hospitalized due to an eye injury and had to cancel his gigs.

Who committed this dreadful act – yes, it was Sooty!

Reading list for MA

I promised my friends at uni that I would let them know, via my blog, what happens on an MA course in creative writing. Well – here is the reading list. I’ve just spent a fortune at Amazon and have had to rearrange my home to accommodate the mammoth delivey of books that I am now expecting.
I was warned there was a lot of reading to do – they weren’t joking!
Never mind, I enjoy a challenge, and having read nothing but set texts or chick-lit for ages this lot will make a refreshing change and broaden my outlook on life. I am ashamed to say that I have only read two books off the list before – so I’m in for a very busy summer.
Fiction Workshop I
Borges, Jorge Luis, Labyrinths, 2000
Calvino, Italo, Invisible Cities, 2002
Carver, Raymond, Cathedral, 1999
Crace, Jim, Continent/Quarantine, 1987
Ford, Richard, The Granta Book of the American Long Story, 1999
Ford, Richard, ed The New Granta Book of the American Short Story, 2007
Kelman, James, Selected Stories, 2001
McEwan, Ian, First Love, Last Rites, 2006
Messud, Clare, Hunters, 2001
Munro, Alice, Selected Stories, 1997
Plimpton, George, ed., Beat Writers at Work: the Paris Review Interviews, 1999
Plimpton, George, ed., Women Writers at Work: the Paris Review Interviews, 2003
Rushdie, Salman, East, West, 1994
Simpson, Helen, Hey Yeah Right Get a Life, 2001
Elisabeth Taylor, The Blush, 1958
Richard Yates, Eleven Kinds of Loneliness, 1962
Tim Winton, The Turning, 2005
Booker, Christopher, The Seven Basic Plots: Why We Tell Stories, 2005
James Wood, How Fiction Works, Jonathan Cape 2008
Margaret Atwood, Negotiating with the Dead, Virago 2007
Morley, David, The Cambridge Introduction to Creative Writing, Cambridge University Press 2007
Mullan, John, How Novels Work, Oxford University Press, 2006
Lodge, David, Consciousness and the Novel, Harvard University Press, 2002
Prose, Francine, Reading Like a Writer; Haper Perennial 2007
WRITING AND THE PRACTICE OF LITERATURE
JA Baker’s The Peregrine
Journals by other writers, e.g. Anaïs Nin, Henry Miller, D.H. Lawrence, Dorothy Wordsworth, Gerald Manley Hopkins, John Fowles, etc.
The Paris Review Interviews, vol 1-4
The Believer Book of Writers Talking to Writers
Annie Dillard, The Writing Life
Nikos Kazantzakis, The Life and Times of Alexei Zorba / Zorba the Greek
Maureen Freely, Enlightenment
Alexander McMasters, Stuart: A Life Backwar
Jim Crace, The Devil’s Larder
Lynda Barry, What It Is
Peter Blegvad, Leviathan
J.G. Ballard, The Atrocity Exhibition
J.G. Ballard, Miracles of Life
Sam Selvon, The Lonely Londoners
James Kelman, How Late it Was, How Late
Damion Searls, ; The Whale
Damion Searls, What We Were Doing and Where We Were Going
[Juan Gabriel Vasquez, The Secret History of Costaguana]
Margaret Atwood, Negotiating the with Dead
[Lorca on duende and darkness vs. Elytis on the mystery of light]
Lewis Hyde, The Gift
FICTION WORKSHOP II
Achebe, Chinua, Things Fall Apart, 2001
Ballard, JG, Supercannes
Baldwin, James, Giovanni’s Room, 1990
Barnes, Julian, Arthur and George, 2006
Coe, Jonathan, The House of Sleep, 1998
Danticat, Edwige, The Dew Breaker, 2004
Delillo, Don, White Noise, 1985
Greene, Graham, The Quiet American, 1955
Ishiguro, Kazuo, An Artist of the Flying World, 1999
McEwan, Ian, On Chesil Beach, 2007
Mitchell, David, Cloud Atlas, 2005
Morrison, Toni, Beloved, 1997
Sinclair, Ian, Downriver, 1991
Vargas Llosa, Mario, The Feast of the Goat, 2003.
McGahern, John, Amongst Women, 1990
Moore, Brian, Lies of Silence, 1992
Kennedy, A.L., Day, 2007
Michaels, Ann, Fugitive Pieces, 1998
Coetzee, JM, Disgrace, 1999
Roth, Philip, American Pastoral, 1998
Mistry, Rohinton, A Fine Balance, 1997
Pamuk, Orhan, The Black Book, 2006
Gordimer, Nadine, The Pickup, 2002
Smiley, Jane A Thousand Acres, 1992
WRITING WRONGS
George Orwell, Why I write (Penguin, 2004)
Susan Sontag, Regarding the Pain of Others
Alexander Solzhenitsyn, One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich
George Orwell, Animal Farm
Philip Gourevitch, We wish to inform you that…
Ivan Klima, My Golden Trades
Kevin Toolis, Rebel Hearts
Yashar Kemal, Memed, my Hawk
Francisco Goldman, The Art of Political Murder
Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird
Rohinton Mistry, A Fine Balance
Agee, James, and Evans, Walker, Let Us Now Praise Famous Men
Arendt, Hannah; Eichmann in Jerusalem: A Report on the Banality of Evil
Baldwin, James, The Fire Next Time
Cercas, Javier; The Anatomy of a Moment
Duras, Marguerite, The War
Feitlowitz, Marguerite; A Lexicon of terror: Argentina and the Legacies of Torture
Gelhorn, Martha; The Face of War
Gourevitch, Philip and Morris, Errol; Standard Operating Procedure: A War Story
Hersey, John; Hiroshima
Levi, Primo, The Drowned and the Saved
Moorehead, Caroline; Human Cargo
Roy, Arundhati, The Algebra of Infinite Justice
Toolis, Kevin, Rebel Hearts
Verbitsky, Horacio; Confessions of an Argentine Dirty Warrior
Vuillamy, Ed; Amexica: War along the Borderline
Zephania, Benjamin, Too Black, Too Strong
Baldwin, James, Go Tell it on the Mountain
Ben Jelloun, Tahar, This Blinding Absence of Light
Brink, Andre, A Dry White Season
Ellison, Ralph, The Invisible Man
Figeras, Marcelo, Kamchatka
Hamid, Mohsin, The Reluctant Fundamentalist
Haviaras, Stratis, The Heroic Age
Klima, Ivan, My Golden Trades
Kundera, Milan, The Book of Laughter and Forgetting
Llosa, Mario Vargas, The Feast of the Goat
Pamuk, Orhan, Snow
Steinbeck, John, The Grapes of Wrath
Tsirkas, Stratis, Drifting Cities
Ugresic, Dubravka, The Ministry of Pain

Fish and chips

Do you like going to the seaside?


There is nothing nicer that eating fish and chips smothered in salt and vinegar at the seaside, but your bliss may be short –lived if a seagull spots you.
I’ve had many a chip nicked at Llandudno, and it is very entertaining to watch the cunning birds swoop down and help themselves to people’s snacks and ice creams as they try to enjoy the sea view.
The problem must be rife in seaside towns - a chip shop owner in Bridlington has had to put up signs warning people about chip stealing seagulls because his profits have dwindled through people demanding reimbursement.

So, just be careful if you eat in front of seagulls – they can be quite vicious!


http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-humber-14129164