Sue's Blog

Bah humbug

2011-12-08T14:04:00.000Z

People never cease to amaze me.
The festive season is supposed to be a time of goodwill, a time when we think kindly about others. (Although it would be wonderful if people could do this all year round – the world would be a much nicer place).
So I was horrified to read today that a couple of fathers got into a fight at their children’s nativity play in South Shields. During the brawl one man bit the other man’s finger off and spat it out – yuck!!!
Thankfully the children did not witness this appalling spectacle of blood and gore. The brawlers were carted off to the hospital / police station adding to the festive work load for medics and others.

What a pair of …well, words fail me – feel free to add your own.

Silly season

2011-09-30T14:26:00.000+01:00

It must be the effect of the heat because we seem to be in the throws of a belated silly season.
Why - because the government is contemplating increasing the speed limit on motorways to 80 (i.e. most people will do 90) thus scaring the s*** out of us poor nervous lady drivers. There are enough maniacs on the roads and this move will only lead to more accidents and chaos. What about the environment!!!!
I guess the ConDems want people to buy more petrol to boost the economy and don’t give a stuff people’s welfare.

As for the mooted weekly bin collection at great expense – most of us are now heavily into recycling and it seems like an ill-thought out and ridiculous waste of money.

Scary

2011-09-23T17:11:00.001+01:00

A piece of space junk is due to hit earth tonight. I hope it does not land on you. Here is another scary thing to ponder over the week end.

Prof Brian Cox explores the possibility that the World may end in 2012 at the end of the Mayan Long Count.

This is really scary - I’m talking about his driving!

Miracles of Life

2011-09-21T18:02:00.000+01:00

The reading list for my MA is colossal (as I mentioned in a previous post), but I am diligently working my way through it. So far the books have all been well written, but some, which shall remain nameless, have been a boring and failed to grip my imagination.
For the last two days, however, I have been engrossed in J.G Ballard’s autobiography, Miracles of Life. It deals with his childhood in Shanghai, his experience of a Japanese POW camp, his life as a student, marriage, and becoming a single father after his wife’s death. It is a fascinating insight into the experiences that shaped his novels and short stories and his development as a writer and a human being.
It is stunning and very moving. I’ve just finished reading it and had to have a good cry.

Wee, piss, urine and piddle

2011-09-20T16:36:00.000+01:00

Ugghhhhhhhhh…Why do people have to wee all over toilet seats!!!!!

This phenomenon seems to have appeared over the last few years and is becoming an epidemic.
As you can see I am very annoyed about it.
It does not matter where I go in the UK it seems to be a problem everywhere.

What is wrong with people – why are you all doing it – I would be very grateful if someone could explain why we have to put up with this appalling behaviour.

I wish someone would start a protest movement for better standards in communal lavatories.

I bet all you phantom piddlers don’t do this in your own homes!!!!!

Shoddy clothes

2011-09-19T10:42:00.001+01:00

Is it just my imagination or is the quality of clothes deteriorating whilst the price is increasing.

Years ago one could purchase items of clothing form a certain high street store that were so robust that they seemed to last forever – now the same establishment produces stuff that fades, bobbles and disintegrates rapidly after purchase.

The fabric that clothes are made from also seems to be thinner and a lot of items are almost ‘see-through’.

Do people prefer a rapid turnover of disintegrating clothes these days?

Are we being exploited by the clothing industry?

Sadly, even buying more expensive items is not a guarantee of longevity – I bought a lovely jumper ‘for best’ and was horrified to see holes appearing in it and the knitting unraveling…. Grrrrrrr

Which character are you?

2011-09-14T08:30:00.002+01:00

Good morning dear reader, I hope you are well.

Do you ever find yourself identifying with characters in books?

I’ve empathazised with some very strange characters at times.

When I was working I felt like Boxer from Animal Farm. Boxer’s fate still has the capacity to reduce me to tears when I re read it. Unlike poor Boxer, I’ve escaped and I’m off to pastures new.

When I left my husband my Aunt gave me a copy of The Tenant of Wildfell Hall - it was a great comfort to know I was not alone in the dreadful experience I had been through, and the book helped me make some sense of my own predicament.

Have any fictional characters helped you to make sense of your life?

Are there any characters that you identify with?

Endings

2011-09-13T10:41:00.000+01:00

Yesterday was a full moon – a time of endings.
A group of us met in our university coffee shop. It felt like it would be the last time we would all be there together.
It was strange and sad to see the freshers clutching their welcome packs and getting their photos and computer passwords sorted out.
We felt like unwanted old chicks tossed out of the nest to make way for the new ones.
We don’t want this to be the final goodbye so our plan is to set up an informal group for people interested in books and writing. We will meet when we can, jobs and postgrad degrees permitting, in our university town to discuss things that we have read and support each other with our writing.
We still need to identify a venue that serves coffee and caters for groups of literary enthusiasts.

Happy Birthday to me

2011-09-11T09:02:00.000+01:00

It is my birthday again and it is probably the saddest day in the year to have a birthday. I’ve not felt like celebrating since 9/11 but today I’m being dragged out for lunch by my parents and children.

My birthday wish for me is that one day I will write something worth publishing – sadly I’ve had no success so far with short story competitions – but I’m not going to give up.

I wish you all a happy year and may your dreams come true.

Valete Omnes

2011-09-07T12:43:00.001+01:00

It was my graduation yesterday and it was one of the happiest days of my life. My family came to watch my two minutes of fame and my short-lived career on the stage.
I was very lucky to study at Wolverhampton University and I cannot recommend it highly enough. It is the most student- friendly and nurturing university in the UK and has the best and most inspiring lecturers.
(I can say this with the benefit of having a previous degree in an unrelated subject form a red-brick Russell group institution where the lectures were boring and nobody gave a s*** about the students).
The learning experience at Wolverhampton was brilliant and the university deserves to be rewarded and acknowledged for the good work it does.
Positions on league tables and ‘prestigiousness’ do not necessarily mean ‘better’ in my opinion.

A good time was had by all

2011-09-02T12:32:00.004+01:00

A group of us went to Candi’s book launch last night and we had a great time. Candi looked stunning in a slinky dress and high heels. She read from her new novel Kalahari Passage and told us about the research she had undertaken in Africa.
The venue was Waterstone’s in New Street, Birmingham. The book displays had been cleared away in the front entrance and replaced by rows of chairs. The shop has a beautiful ceiling with a stained glass roof, which I had never noticed before.
We queued to get our copies signed and Candi wrote individual things for each of us that we shall treasure.
I began reading my copy on the train home and nearly missed my stop because I was so engrossed.

Candi’s book launch

2011-08-30T14:56:00.001+01:00

Just to let you all know, Tindal Street Press is hosting a book launch for Candi Miller’s latest book, Kalahari Passage.

It is taking place at Waterstone’s book shop, 128 New Street , Birmingham at 7pm, on Thursday, 1st of September.

If you would like to go along please could you contact Rikhi Ubhi on 0121 773 8157.

Or e-mail Rikhi - rikhi@tindalstreet.co.uk

http://www.tindalstreet.co.uk/events/the-launch-of-kalahari-passage

Obesity

2011-08-27T20:25:00.001+01:00

I read an article the other day that said that women’s’ waistlines were now on average 6 inches bigger than in the 1950s. I can well believe that is true - If you watch films from the post-war era people looked a lot shorter and thinner than they do now. This was because the population had suffered communal food deprivation. The effects of rationing meant that people did not have a lot to eat and fat and sugar were rare treats.

We now have abundance and easy access to tasty food in mammoth quantities. The result is that we have become a nation of gluttons, encouraged by the food industry and supermarkets. If people were suffering rationing now there would not be an obesity epidemic – so it is all down to availability and portions sizes.

Helping people not to become obese is a challenge. I think that there needs to be a radical shift in society to make the food industry downsize our ‘portions’ and offer realistic ones rather than jumbo supersize things. (I bet George Osborne would love to levy a ‘fat’ tax on people who are overweight – he could rake in millions).
Smaller plates and bowls might help.
So might education in schools - teaching children how to cook proper food and not rely on microwave convenience food and the chip shop.

Yes – I’m a glutton too and guilty of living to eat, so I sympathize with anyone who loves food too much and has an expanding waste line.

What do you think – should people be allowed to get fatter and fatter?
Is obesity a matter of our own personal responsibility?
Or do we need a radical shift as a society in our attitude to food?

Dilemma

2011-08-23T16:55:00.002+01:00

I’ve spent the last few weeks grappling with the concept of what constitutes a good short story. This is in preparation for my forthcoming MA as short stories seem to be a major component of the modules I’ve chosen.

I’m still bogged down by the mammoth reading list and finding some of the short stories challenging to say the least because they are not the sort of thing I enjoy or would read by choice. (I prefer to read light-weight chick lit and escapist stuff with happy endings and my writing style probably reflects my innate superficial proclivities).

Jackie Kay said in Mslexia that the best short stories should be ‘unnerving’ – but at this stage in my writing career I can’t say that I am drawn to ‘the unnerving’ and I’m still suffering the toxic after-effects of William Burroughs’s psychotic snippets in Naked Lunch.

Do you agree with Jackie Kay - should short stories be unnerving?

What do you think a ‘good’ short story should be like??

What is your favourite short story and why???

In my research on the subject of short stories I came across these suggestions on the link below – and you can access the podcasts too.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2011/dec/11/writers-pick-favourite-short-stories

Rail fares

2011-08-11T14:59:00.002+01:00

Just to add to our general misery, there are plans to increase rail fares. How will we ever have a decent public transport system and get cars off the roads if the average person cannot afford to travel by rail?

I was in Belgium recently and was impressed by the clean, frequent and cheap bus service. Their rail service was also exemplary – the trains were clean and on time, and there were plenty of seats for everybody. So why have we in the UK got to put up with over-priced, overcrowded, dirty trains with stinking bogs occupied by a constant stream of fare dodgers. Our trains can never be guaranteed to run on time because of the thousand and one excuses that are trotted out like 'cows on the line' or 'signalling failure'.

If you are fed up with all this then there is a petition you can sign – link below, and there will also be a rally on Tuesday morning 16th August in London out side Waterloo station.

http://www.fairfaresnow.org.uk/petition.

What can society do?

2011-08-10T08:37:00.000+01:00

People are asking themselves what has gone wrong with our society to spark the riots we have seen over the past few days.
I was horrified by the total callousness of these 'rioters' who stole from an injured man and left him there. They reminded me of the worst type of school bully - showing no compassion for others and swaggering off with their cronies. What has caused their lack of morals and compassion?

Do these people come from homes where parents have abused or neglected them, and this is all they know – or are they just psychopaths?
What can be done to stop the rot??

Any suggestions???

Progress report

2011-08-04T17:18:00.000+01:00

I’ve made a start on the reading list for my MA, having had a massive cull to make space for the 80+ books I’ve ordered. I’m a very slow reader (because I like to linger over words – no, I’m really a bit thick and I have to read slowly to make sure I’ve grasped the gist of things). Also, I’ve had to shelve any delusions about writing novel number two this holiday because of the frightening volume of reading I need to do.

It is my own fault – I got side tracked by Mr. Wroe’s Virgins and Angela Carter’s Bloody Chamber and I’m looking longingly at Neil Gaiman’s oeuvres that I would rather be reading.

I have read three and a half books so far. I enjoyed James Kelman’s gritty Scottish Selected Stories, and Helen Simpson’s Hey Yeah Right Get a Life. I struggled with Jim Crace’s Quarantine – it was well written, but I found it unsettling because its content thwarted my assumptions and was unpleasant in parts – I won’t spoil the ending in case anyone plans to read it.

The best one so far is Tim Winton’s The Turning – it is excellent. His writing is superb, precise and concise, his characters are compelling and the setting (Perth, Australia) is wonderful.

I’m impressed with the reading list so far.

Violence

2011-08-03T14:21:00.000+01:00

I was shocked to learn today that one of my childhood heroes has become a violent thug. The villain in question threw a pizza at Paul Daniels.

Paul Daniels ended up being hospitalized due to an eye injury and had to cancel his gigs.

Who committed this dreadful act – yes, it was Sooty!

Reading list for MA

2011-07-28T10:51:00.001+01:00

I promised my friends at uni that I would let them know, via my blog, what happens on an MA course in creative writing. Well – here is the reading list. I’ve just spent a fortune at Amazon and have had to rearrange my home to accommodate the mammoth delivey of books that I am now expecting.
I was warned there was a lot of reading to do – they weren’t joking!
Never mind, I enjoy a challenge, and having read nothing but set texts or chick-lit for ages this lot will make a refreshing change and broaden my outlook on life. I am ashamed to say that I have only read two books off the list before – so I’m in for a very busy summer.
Fiction Workshop I
Borges, Jorge Luis, Labyrinths, 2000
Calvino, Italo, Invisible Cities, 2002
Carver, Raymond, Cathedral, 1999
Crace, Jim, Continent/Quarantine, 1987
Ford, Richard, The Granta Book of the American Long Story, 1999
Ford, Richard, ed The New Granta Book of the American Short Story, 2007
Kelman, James, Selected Stories, 2001
McEwan, Ian, First Love, Last Rites, 2006
Messud, Clare, Hunters, 2001
Munro, Alice, Selected Stories, 1997
Plimpton, George, ed., Beat Writers at Work: the Paris Review Interviews, 1999
Plimpton, George, ed., Women Writers at Work: the Paris Review Interviews, 2003
Rushdie, Salman, East, West, 1994
Simpson, Helen, Hey Yeah Right Get a Life, 2001
Elisabeth Taylor, The Blush, 1958
Richard Yates, Eleven Kinds of Loneliness, 1962
Tim Winton, The Turning, 2005
Booker, Christopher, The Seven Basic Plots: Why We Tell Stories, 2005
James Wood, How Fiction Works, Jonathan Cape 2008
Margaret Atwood, Negotiating with the Dead, Virago 2007
Morley, David, The Cambridge Introduction to Creative Writing, Cambridge University Press 2007
Mullan, John, How Novels Work, Oxford University Press, 2006
Lodge, David, Consciousness and the Novel, Harvard University Press, 2002
Prose, Francine, Reading Like a Writer; Haper Perennial 2007
WRITING AND THE PRACTICE OF LITERATURE
JA Baker’s The Peregrine
Journals by other writers, e.g. Anaïs Nin, Henry Miller, D.H. Lawrence, Dorothy Wordsworth, Gerald Manley Hopkins, John Fowles, etc.
The Paris Review Interviews, vol 1-4
The Believer Book of Writers Talking to Writers
Annie Dillard, The Writing Life
Nikos Kazantzakis, The Life and Times of Alexei Zorba / Zorba the Greek
Maureen Freely, Enlightenment
Alexander McMasters, Stuart: A Life Backwar
Jim Crace, The Devil’s Larder
Lynda Barry, What It Is
Peter Blegvad, Leviathan
J.G. Ballard, The Atrocity Exhibition
J.G. Ballard, Miracles of Life
Sam Selvon, The Lonely Londoners
James Kelman, How Late it Was, How Late
Damion Searls, ; The Whale
Damion Searls, What We Were Doing and Where We Were Going
[Juan Gabriel Vasquez, The Secret History of Costaguana]
Margaret Atwood, Negotiating the with Dead
[Lorca on duende and darkness vs. Elytis on the mystery of light]
Lewis Hyde, The Gift
FICTION WORKSHOP II
Achebe, Chinua, Things Fall Apart, 2001
Ballard, JG, Supercannes
Baldwin, James, Giovanni’s Room, 1990
Barnes, Julian, Arthur and George, 2006
Coe, Jonathan, The House of Sleep, 1998
Danticat, Edwige, The Dew Breaker, 2004
Delillo, Don, White Noise, 1985
Greene, Graham, The Quiet American, 1955
Ishiguro, Kazuo, An Artist of the Flying World, 1999
McEwan, Ian, On Chesil Beach, 2007
Mitchell, David, Cloud Atlas, 2005
Morrison, Toni, Beloved, 1997
Sinclair, Ian, Downriver, 1991
Vargas Llosa, Mario, The Feast of the Goat, 2003.
McGahern, John, Amongst Women, 1990
Moore, Brian, Lies of Silence, 1992
Kennedy, A.L., Day, 2007
Michaels, Ann, Fugitive Pieces, 1998
Coetzee, JM, Disgrace, 1999
Roth, Philip, American Pastoral, 1998
Mistry, Rohinton, A Fine Balance, 1997
Pamuk, Orhan, The Black Book, 2006
Gordimer, Nadine, The Pickup, 2002
Smiley, Jane A Thousand Acres, 1992
WRITING WRONGS
George Orwell, Why I write (Penguin, 2004)
Susan Sontag, Regarding the Pain of Others
Alexander Solzhenitsyn, One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich
George Orwell, Animal Farm
Philip Gourevitch, We wish to inform you that…
Ivan Klima, My Golden Trades
Kevin Toolis, Rebel Hearts
Yashar Kemal, Memed, my Hawk
Francisco Goldman, The Art of Political Murder
Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird
Rohinton Mistry, A Fine Balance
Agee, James, and Evans, Walker, Let Us Now Praise Famous Men
Arendt, Hannah; Eichmann in Jerusalem: A Report on the Banality of Evil
Baldwin, James, The Fire Next Time
Cercas, Javier; The Anatomy of a Moment
Duras, Marguerite, The War
Feitlowitz, Marguerite; A Lexicon of terror: Argentina and the Legacies of Torture
Gelhorn, Martha; The Face of War
Gourevitch, Philip and Morris, Errol; Standard Operating Procedure: A War Story
Hersey, John; Hiroshima
Levi, Primo, The Drowned and the Saved
Moorehead, Caroline; Human Cargo
Roy, Arundhati, The Algebra of Infinite Justice
Toolis, Kevin, Rebel Hearts
Verbitsky, Horacio; Confessions of an Argentine Dirty Warrior
Vuillamy, Ed; Amexica: War along the Borderline
Zephania, Benjamin, Too Black, Too Strong
Baldwin, James, Go Tell it on the Mountain
Ben Jelloun, Tahar, This Blinding Absence of Light
Brink, Andre, A Dry White Season
Ellison, Ralph, The Invisible Man
Figeras, Marcelo, Kamchatka
Hamid, Mohsin, The Reluctant Fundamentalist
Haviaras, Stratis, The Heroic Age
Klima, Ivan, My Golden Trades
Kundera, Milan, The Book of Laughter and Forgetting
Llosa, Mario Vargas, The Feast of the Goat
Pamuk, Orhan, Snow
Steinbeck, John, The Grapes of Wrath
Tsirkas, Stratis, Drifting Cities
Ugresic, Dubravka, The Ministry of Pain

Fish and chips

2011-07-15T17:03:00.000+01:00

Do you like going to the seaside?

There is nothing nicer that eating fish and chips smothered in salt and vinegar at the seaside, but your bliss may be short –lived if a seagull spots you.
I’ve had many a chip nicked at Llandudno, and it is very entertaining to watch the cunning birds swoop down and help themselves to people’s snacks and ice creams as they try to enjoy the sea view.
The problem must be rife in seaside towns - a chip shop owner in Bridlington has had to put up signs warning people about chip stealing seagulls because his profits have dwindled through people demanding reimbursement.

So, just be careful if you eat in front of seagulls – they can be quite vicious!

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-humber-14129164

Short Story Competition

2011-07-14T07:51:00.001+01:00

Here is some information about a short story competition. The maximum length for the stories is 3000 words and the competition rules do not state a theme or a genre – so it seems open to all tastes and styles.

The judge is Dr. Paul McDonald from the University of Wolverhampton.

The successful stories will be published in an anthology, and for those of you who like cash incentives, the first prize is £500.

Get writing!!

http://www.ruberybookaward.com/

RIP Curney (21.5.1996 – 7.7.2011)

2011-07-09T18:21:00.001+01:00

My dog died this week. I am heartbroken.
He was the best dog in the world. He was loyal and devoted. He was always ready for a walk, wagging his tail and standing there all excited. He always ate what I gave him and was grateful and very affectionate. He followed me everywhere in the house and garden, like a constant shadow, or one of Philip Pullman’s daemons.
The house is so strange without him. I keep thinking he is just behind the sofa or outside….

Shakespeare sums up death better than I can

Fear no more the heat o’the sun,
Nor the furious winter’s rages,
Thou thy worldly task hast done…

Cymbeline, (IV.ii.260-262)

Rude number plates

2011-06-30T07:23:00.002+01:00

Would you find this number plate offensive?

I personally think it is hilarious and it would be entertaining to see this number plate out on the road.
The DVLA, however, took a dim view of the number plate, and ordered Alan Clarke to remove it (the police must have reported him).
But, Mr. Clarke had bought the number plate in good faith for £399 from the DVLA in the first place, so what is going on here?
Had the DVLA failed to spot the potential of the number plate to upset some people?

Do you think that smutty number plates would brighten up our roads or do you agree with the DVLA?

http://uk.cars.yahoo.com/29062011/36/dvla-bans-obscene-number-plate-0.html

Handbags

2011-06-28T07:49:00.007+01:00

What does a handbag say about its owner? What sort of person would own a handbag like the one in this picture?

Do you think that the style and contents of your handbag reflects your personality?
According to Kathryn Eisman, they do. She spent two years researching the subject and came up with the following

Minimal
These women are the envy of others. Any woman who can make do with a small bag carrying only their necessities – wallet, keys, phone and glasses – has mastered the art of organization and never has to wade through a pile of sweet wrappers or old receipts to find their mobile phone.

Prepared
Not quite as clutter free, but still practical and focused, this woman is extremely well-organized and carries items which are sensible and practical. She likes to be prepared for every eventuality. Be it tissues or toothbrush, hair accessories or phone charger, every item in this bag has a purpose. Women who fit into this category very rarely swap bags, according to Eisman, and are likely to choose neutral colors and classic cuts which will never go out of style.

Creative
According to Eisman’s research the creative woman has a free spirit and “tends to rebel against conformity.” Their bag is most likely to be a treasure trove or a bottomless pit. However, the contents are still relatively organized – full but functional, even though it may appear chaotic to the casual observer. Household bills, medicines, food wrappers and other assortments of random items can be found lurking at the bottom of this purse. The Creative spirit likes handbags in bright colors, showing others that she is fun and approachable, says Eisman.

The Florence Nightingale
These women are caring and sensitive and carry a multitude of items which are useful to others. Medicines, band aids, mints, chewing gum, perfume, tissues, safety pins and other practical items. Expressive personalities also tend to carry sentimental trinkets, photos of loved ones and a book or magazine which they can lose themselves in. Often appearing shy, don’t be fooled by this woman’s exterior, according to Eisman, there is a wild side just waiting to be unleashed!

Not only can the style of handbag give away your personality type but your color choice is also an indication. According to Eisman, women who go for bright colors tend to be fun loving, friendly and approachable. These are women who will happily strike up a conversation with a stranger, in an elevator or a train compartment.

Colour Neutral, classic colors such as black and brown means that the owner may be more reserved and appear less approachable. Sometimes coming across as shy, these women are confident and are often down-to-earth.

I have one black (very tidy) bag that I’ve used for years and one very large red bag crammed with stuff that I use for uni...

Happy Smurf Day

2011-06-25T07:56:00.003+01:00

Do you like the smurfs?
Are you celebrating Smurf Day today?

I love the smurfs – they don’t do politics and live in a happy communal village where everyone is kind and helps everyone else. The smurfs don’t use money and are not troubled by greedy bankers or exploited by their employers. Everything they do is for the good of the community.

Professor Ellis Cashmore, a sociologist from Staffordshire University thinks that the smurfs embody the ethos of the Big Society. He said: ‘Cameron is asking people to get organized with their local community, have organic collectivity and work for each other, like we used to before industrialization came along and fragmented society.’

Other people believe that their creator, Peyo, used them as a metaphor for socialism.

For those of you who have been scarred for life by psycho exes the idea of peaceful communal harmony could be very tempting as the smurfs don’t seem to go in for one to one relationships.

Perhaps we could learn a lot about how to organize a fair and tolerant society from the smurfs – what do you think?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-13878108

Politics and the English language

2011-06-21T12:38:00.004+01:00

I’ve just been reading a fascinating essay by George Orwell on the use of hackneyed euphemisms in political-speak. It was written in 1946, but it still applies today.
Orwell says that ‘politics itself is a mass of lies, evasions, folly, hatred and schizophrenia’. I don’t agree with the last bit, but the other comments seem accurate and I get really annoyed when politicians and the media use cosy phrases to describe awful things with the aim of attenuating them and making them more 'acceptable'.
Orwell’s essay argues that writers should make their meaning clear and not used clichés.
He offers the following tips for writers – (politicians don’t seem to follow Orwell’s advice - I wonder why!!!!)
1. Never use a metaphor, simile, or other figure of speech which you are used to seeing in print.
2. Never use a long word where a short one will do.
3. If it is possible to cut a word out, always cut it out.
4. Never use the passive where you can use the active.
5. Never use a foreign phrase, a scientific word, or a jargon word if you can think of an everyday English equivalent.
6. Break any of these rules sooner than say anything outright barbarous.

Changes

2011-06-16T10:47:00.001+01:00

Sadly I have to leave my lovely university with its superb lecturers and head off to pastures new. I now have my degree classification and thankfully I have managed to fulfil my conditional offer - so I’m off to do an MA in creative writing at another university in the Midlands. I just wish that I could have stayed at my current university, but it does not offer an MA course in my chosen subject.
I thought people might be interested in what it is like to attend an MA course in creative writing, so I will be posting things on my blog about my experiences. It might be useful for anybody thinking of applying for an MA in creative writing, and may vicariously help those who don’t have time to.

Blood red moon

2011-06-15T14:21:00.002+01:00

There will be a total lunar eclipse tonight – so if you have nothing better to do go outside at approximately 9pm and stare at the sky for an hour.

If it is clear night you may see the moon turn blood red!

Bank Holiday boredom

2011-05-30T09:37:00.002+01:00

It is the Bank Holiday and it is raining. If you have nothing better to do then have a go at this Myer Briggs personality test. It will tell you what job you should consider.
I’ve just had a go at it and it says that I should consider teaching as a career.

http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/jtypes1.htm

Death by cucumber

2011-05-30T07:18:00.001+01:00

No. this is not the joke about the naughty nuns in the vegetable patch, but a scary story about infected cucumbers entering the food chain and killing people. Several people have died in Germany as a result of imported Spanish organic cucumbers infected with E.coli. So far ten people have died from kidney failure in the Hamburg area.
I don’t know if any infected cucumbers have reached the UK, but if you are off to Hamburg don’t eat any cucumber.

Is waiting for results worse than doing the assignments?

2011-05-28T14:35:00.001+01:00

I can’t believe that my three years at university have finished. The time has whizzed past in a blur of assignments, as if life has been stuck on fast-forward. Now I have the nerve-wracking wait for my results, and in some ways I’d rather do a hundred essays than hang around in a constant state of nauseated nervous anxiety worrying about my grades.

Advice to any first and second years reading this blog: when you get into the third year try and work consistently throughout the year on your year-long projects/ dissertation because everything implodes on top of you in the last semester – even if you have brilliant time-management skills.

End of the world?

2011-05-21T10:48:00.002+01:00

I thought it was the end of the world this week because I could not access my blog and kept getting an error message. Thanks to advice from plashing vole normal service has been resumed.
I’ve not been able to blog for ages because I’ve had too much uni work to do, and needed to prioritize it over blogging and entering writing competitions. Then when I did have time to blog I could not get into my Google account or blogger dashboard.
I think a lot of fellow bloggers have been busy with uni work too. How did you cope with your dissertations?
The only thing that got me through the mountain of assignments and the dissertation was chocolate. On the worst day I managed to get through three Toblerones. Needless to say, I have emerged fat and unhealthy after the experience. I never want to see chocolate again – well, not until the next dissertation!

Are you all doing anything special to mark the end of the world?

I’m not, because it is a load of twaddle – although the skies over Telford are now an oppressive apocalyptic grey....
In case you have not heard about the end of the world forecasts they are the work of 89 year old Harold Camping - a retired civil engineer form Oakland, California, who spreads his messages of gloom via the Family Radio Network. He came up with this prediction after some mind boggling calculations.

Have a nice week-end!

Competition Time

2011-05-15T15:30:00.002+01:00

Sorry it is short notice, but if you like writing competitions Woman and Home is offering a £1000 prize and a set of the 20 shortlisted books for the Costa Book Awards for 2011, for the best short story.
The closing date is this Friday.
You need to write 2500 words on the theme of ‘the secret’, but the title is up to you.
You will need the entry coupon from the May issue of W&H

Wishing you every happiness Kate and William

2011-04-29T07:16:00.001+01:00

Here is a tribute form Kate’s thwarted admirers.

Do you like French films?

2011-04-10T19:34:00.004+01:00

I do – I did French at school and I like to try and watch French films when I get the chance.
I came across Spiral by accident last night on BBC 4 and was hooked.
It is a French murder investigation series set in Paris and last night there were two episodes of ‘The Butcher of La Villette’
I got totally engrossed in it and can’t wait for the next two episodes on Saturday. It was nothing like Midsomer Murders, Morse or Miss Marple – it was more like a good Zola novel with a lot of dodgy police practices and covert brutality - Enjoy!
(It has sub-titles in English)

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b0072wk9

Dentists

2011-03-05T13:48:00.002Z

Do you like going to the dentist?

Well, a dentist in Shropshire got into trouble recently.
No – it was not for killing people or for fondling his patients - but for gassing them!

So what you might think, but Matthew Walton, the dentist is question, apparently thought it was hilarious to belch and fart in front of staff and patients at his dental surgery, and he rounded off his melodious eructations by flourishing a few V signs behind his departing patients’ backs.

After reading this you won’t be able to keep a straight face if the dentist offers you ‘gas’ next time you go for a filling.

http://www.metro.co.uk/news/856428-farting-dentist-was-so-smelly-we-felt-sick

World Book Night

2011-03-03T22:06:00.002Z

Our lecturer today reminded us that it is World Book Night on Saturday. To mark the occasion she is distributing copies of Love in the Time of Cholera by Gabriel Garcia Marquez to our class for us to share and pass round. This is her favourite book. I think that it is wonderful that she is sharing this with us, and I can’t wait to read it.

Sadly, I have not come across a book so far that has had that sort of life changing or profound effect on me, but that is probably because I only get time to read university set books with the odd bit of chick-lit as escapism, but I’m up for new book experiences so all suggestions are welcome.

Have you ever been so moved emotionally by a book that you would like to share it with other people – and if so what is it?

Behave your self at the cinema!

2011-02-23T11:57:00.002Z

Do you get annoyed at the cinema when people talk all through the film, bleep away on their mobile phones, gobble crunchy crisps and rustle sweet wrappers?

Well, in Latvia things turned very nasty yesterday at a showing of ‘Black Swan’. Nikolajs Zikovs shot forty- three- year- old banker, Aigers Egle because he had been stuffing himself noisily with popcorn during the film - at least he waited until the film ended before shooting the banker.

I thought this is really scary and just shows how intolerant people are becoming.

Or perhaps you think that people who spoil films are a menace and this incident was just a matter of time.

Perhaps it would be better to ban phones, food and drinks in cinemas on health and safety grounds – but then cinemas are struggling financially and the disgusting array of unhealthy, obesity –inducing ‘food’ substances they offer are a source of income for them.

Marylebone - Wrexham service

2011-01-26T11:40:00.002Z

I was very upset to hear today that the Wrexham Marylebone train service is to close. The service was superb and it was like stepping back in time to a more peaceful, civilized era, not the horrible, standing room only situation on the other services from Shropshire, with smelly wet toilets and constant battles between the ticket persons and fare dodgers.
I wish someone out there could rescue this service and keep its old fashioned values. It will be missed.

Life isn’t fair

2011-01-22T08:26:00.002Z

I have not blogged for a while because I’m suffering from third year syndrome – too much work to do - (any first or second year university students reading this post take note – the work increases exponentially each year).
Also the stuff that is going on in the country since the ConDems appeared is making me very worried. Normally I like to poke fun at politicians – but this lot just aren’t funny.
I’ve been very annoyed about bankers' bonuses – nothing has been done, but everyone else is suffering.
I was even more annoyed today when I read that university vice-chancellors' pay went up astronomically last year, but students will have to bear harsh tuition fees.
I suspect we will see increasing unrest in the land as people realize they are being massively ripped off and conned and finally get fed up with it.
A decent and fair society should have free top quality health and education - we pay enough in taxes for it – so where is all the money going?????????????

New Year’s Resolutions

2010-12-31T07:57:00.001Z

The new year marks a turning point and a symbolic opportunity to change old behaviour patterns and habits.
New year TV adverts are usually full of celebrity exercise videos, diet clubs, and quit smoking treatments, exhorting people to get fit and healthy by making them feel guilty. Gym membership peaks in the first few weeks of January as people feel they should be doing something about their festive podge.

As the old year fades away what are you planning to do in the new year?
Have you got a list of resolutions that you feel you ought to be doing?
Have you got some exciting goals that you want to achieve?
Do you think resolutions are a good thing or doomed to failure?

I’m aiming to do more exercise as my new year’s resolution.

Wishing you every success with whatever you decide to do for your new year – even if it is not to make new year’s resolutions.

Merry Christmas

2010-12-25T06:32:00.002Z

The shops are shut. The turkey is well and truly stuffed and Christmas is here.
It only seems like five minutes since last Christmas.
I hope Santa brought you what you wanted, and if he didn’t then you can demand a refund or roast his reindeer.
I hope your relatives all behave themselves, and that Christmas passes without any festive punch-ups – verbal or otherwise.

Have a great day!

£250 for a Christmas pudding???

2010-12-22T10:35:00.001Z

Waitrose sold Heston Blumenthal’s Christmas puddings for £13.99. They went like hot cakes, so to speak. Now punters on eBay are charging £250 for the puds.
Some people must be mad if they are prepared to blow £13.99 on a Christmas pudding, let alone £250!!!!
I made mine for a few pounds - a gluten free one for my sister and a traditional one for the rest of the family.
Christmas pudding is very easy to make, the only drawback is the eight hours simmering, but the house smells wonderful and Christmassy. I must confess to being rather partial to the hot brandy sauce that accompanies the pudding.

I bet mine tastes nicer than yours Heston!!!!

Beware - Google can see your knickers

2010-12-20T15:15:00.003Z

A Japanese woman from Fukuoka is trying to sue Google for showing her underwear on Street View.
The woman, who has not been named, is reported to be after 600,000 yen (£4,588) from Google, after claiming she suffered psychological distress as a result of her washing line being featured on the Street View function.
According to Japan's Mainichi newspaper, the woman told a court hearing, that she was frightened that she would become the victim of sex crime after Google showed her knickers drying outside.
The name of the town sounds like something from a Carry On film, so may be she has grounds to fear the rampant passions of the locals.

http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/850962-woman-sues-google-for-showing-her-underwear-on-street-view#ixzz18fDUsq86

Happy Birthday to Jane Austen

2010-12-16T08:11:00.002Z

Many of my blog readers are avid Jane Austen fans. Some are even doing their dissertations on her novels.
If I had to choose one book to take to a desert island, it would be Pride and Prejudice. I must confess to hating it when I had to read it at school for O level. Years later I was mesmerized when Colin Firth emerged from the lake at Pemberley and became the quintessential Darcy in his dripping white shirt…swoon.
I read Pride and Prejudice again and became hooked. No matter how many times I read it, I get more out of it. It is the classic chick-lit love story.
I also love Persuasion and Sense and Sensibility ( I think the latter had something to do with Dominic Cooper in the BBC production).

Which is you favourite Austen novel???

Telford is famous at last!

2010-12-11T12:17:00.001Z

Have you ever been to Telford?
When I first came to Telford, I thought the place was a confusing collection of roundabouts and housing estates – with more roundabouts. It took me ages to find my way around.
Myth has it that the design for Telford came from the planners' tea cup stains on their blueprint for the place. If you’ve ever tried to drive round Telford then you will know what I'm on about.

Telford’s roundabouts featured on Have I Got News For You, last week.

Guest presenter Miranda Hart asked: "Telford's roundabouts created what?"
Comedian Greg Davies replied: "A vortex that sucked in anything picturesque and all sense of hope."

In 2005, the Roundabout Appreciation Society produced a calendar of Telford’s magnificent roundabouts, but I doubt many people bought it.

Writing Competition

2010-12-07T07:49:00.001Z

Hello Writers – how are things with you?
If you are in the third year then you probably don’t have any spare time due to the volume of work.
Just in case you need a break from the grind, could do with £2,000 , a one-week writing retreat at Chawton House Library and a day with a Virago editor then have a go at the Mslexia Short Story Competition.
The closing date is 24th January 2011, and the judge is Jackie Kay.
2,200 words max, on any subject you like.

It does say ‘Women’s Short Story Competition’, so although I think this is sexist and unfair, it is for ladies only.

Missing Snowman

2010-12-04T10:32:00.003Z

Are you enjoying the snow boys and girls?
It has caused chaos all over the country, and put a strain on the emergency services.
I bet the police in Kent were annoyed when a woman rang 999 to report her snowman had gone missing. Here is a transcript of the call:

“I haven't been out to check on him for five hours but I went outside for a fag (cigarette) and he's gone," said the female caller.
When the operator asked who had gone she replied: "My snowman. I thought that with it being icy and there not being anybody about he'd be safe.
"It ain't a nice road but you don't expect anybody to nick your snowman," she added.

The Police were not amused – no wonder one in ten of the police force is off sick according to today’s figures.

Free Books!

2010-12-03T07:39:00.004Z

Hello fellow readers and writers – you might be interested in World Book Night which starts on Saturday 5th Match 2011. It is a celebration of reading and 1 million books will be given away by 20,000 readers to people across the UK.

From 2 December 2010, members of the public are invited to apply to be one of the 20,000 givers of 48 copies of their favourite book chosen from a carefully selected list of 25 titles. Most givers are expected to be passionate readers who will take pleasure in recommending a book they love to other readers. However, World Book Night will also encourage givers to pass the books on to others who either may be reluctant readers or who are part of communities with less access to books, bookshops and libraries. 960,000 books will be distributed by givers and a further 40,000 will be distributed by WBN to people who might not otherwise be able to participate.

The link for the World Book Night is below if you are interested.

http://www.worldbooknight.org/2010/12/the-largest-book-give-away-ever-attempted/

How do you cook?

2010-11-22T17:17:00.001Z

I’ve had some fascinating conversations with people about cooking. It seems that some people are really organized and slavishly follow recipes. They buy all the ingredients specially, and are heavily into experimentation. They have books by all the TV chefs and try different menus every day.
Then you get the other sort of people who make concoctions out of random things, based on what needs using up, or what is left in the fridge and cupboards. It can lead to some fabulous meals or awful disasters.

I wonder if ‘scientific’ types are into the former method of cooking and ‘artistic’ types favour the latter.

And last but not least are the sad lot who can’t cook at all – shame on you!

Kate’s Ring

2010-11-18T13:22:00.002Z

Are you excited about the royal wedding? I think Kate and William seem like a well matched couple.
The only thing that bothers me is that she has been given Princess Diana’s ring.
I don’t know what you think, but I think wearing the ring of someone’s dead mother is a bit creepy. I’d rather have a ring that someone had chosen specially for me even if it only cost £5, rather than a ring chosen for someone else originally.
Or perhaps they are being mindful of hard times and recycling.

What do you think?

How happy are you?

2010-11-15T17:59:00.003Z

Did you know that the government is planning to measure how happy we are?
The Office for National Statistics is going to devise a household survey that will test people’s happiness levels quarterly.

Bet you can’t wait to take part.

This is the brain child of ‘Dave’ who reckons that money isn’t everything.

What will the government do with the findings?

Will they impose a tax on people who are grumpy?
Will they put Prozac into the water supply so that we don’t care anymore that we are all paying for the greedy bankers gambling habits?

What would make you happy?

Communing with nature

2010-11-14T11:58:00.003Z

What do people in rural locations do to pass the time?
Well, I woke up this morning to find that a phantom graffiti artist has paid a visit to my neighbourhood in the night.
I live in a semi rural location that has woods and lakes. It is a beautiful, peaceful place with lots of wild life. People sometimes put posters of their missing pussies on the lampposts, but nothing else detracts from the tranquil idyll.
Now thanks to ‘Liam Ball’ (? the graffiti artist’s real name) the footpaths have been ‘decorated’ with phallic symbols - lots of them.

Is young master Ball in some sort of cult advocating ancient fertility rights? Or was he just off his head on solvents and spray paint last night? If ‘Liam Ball’ is his real name then he was a bit silly to sign his handiwork.
Anyway, the place looks very strange today with all these phalluses.

24th November

2010-11-13T13:20:00.002Z

Here is a very important date for your diaries fellow students.
The National Campaign Against Fees and Cuts is planning a day of action on Wednesday 24th November. There will be mass walkouts at universities across the country.
Hope you can all support it.
There is a site on facebook for our university if you want to add your support to the fight fees campaign.

Student Protest

2010-11-10T11:49:00.003Z

Thousands of students will be marching through the streets of London today in protest at the proposed rises in tuition fees. Many of us want to be there with them but can’t.
You have our support.
It is time students spoke out. Let’s hope that the government take notice. This country needs a well educated work-force. Cutting back on education is a short-sighted solution.

Daybreak

2010-11-05T17:10:00.001Z

What do you think of the new-look breakfast programme on ITV with Adrian Chiles and Christine Bleakley?
I don’t like it at all. I preferred GMTV and I think that ITV have made a very expensive mistake by changing the format and poaching BBC’s dreary double act from the One Show. Daybreak is BORING, despite all the money wasted on high profile guests.
The other day Adrian Chiles had his flies undone on air – sorry Adrian even that won’t help to boost the flagging ratings.
Please bring back the old GMTV it was fun, light-hearted, entertaining and brightened up my mornings!

Dark nights and horrible Halloween

2010-10-29T16:53:00.003+01:00

The clocks go back this week-end with all the attendant faffing about altering clocks and watches.
To make matters worse it is Halloween - so one will have to endure the misery of endless visitations from horrible snot-dribbling children dressed as frightful monstrosities, demanding money with menaces.

Do you find the dark days before Christmas difficult?

This time of the year seems to make a lot of people feel miserable and lethargic - going to work in the dark and coming home in the dark.
Dr. Mayer Hillman, writing in the BMJ today, thinks we would all be a lot healthier and happier if we could leave the clocks as they are in winter, and move them forward an hour in spring. Sounds like a sensible idea.
I would prefer, however, leaving the clocks as they are all year round, so as not to have the bother putting the time backwards and forwards.

What would make me really happy though is banning Halloween!

Is it OK to lie on your blog?

2010-10-26T08:32:00.004+01:00

Is your blog a confection of lies – a rambling outpouring from your fervid imagination?
Do you pretend that you have an amazing social life – one that would make William Burroughs Naked Lunch look like a barn dance at the Church Hall?

Do you think it is acceptable to tell lies on a blog that is connected with your job?

Conservative MP Nadine Dorreis admitted that 70% of her blog about her political activities is fiction. I am sure some people might be annoyed and disgusted to hear that. The public has not forgotten the ‘snouts in trough’ sagas.

Politicians seem to be skilled in the art of obfuscation and verbal conjuring - So perhaps it is stretching things to expect a politician’s blog to be truthful.

Surely it would be better to say nothing rather than to concoct lies?

I don’t read any politicians blogs, and having had a quick look at Ms Dorries blog, because of the furore it has created, I won’t be reading any more – it was boring.

http://blog.dorries.org/Default.aspx

Are miniskirts to blame for society’s ills?

2010-10-25T09:42:00.003+01:00

If you are planning your summer holiday, just bear in mind that the mayor of Castellammare di Stabia, Luigi Bobbio, is threatening to impose a ban on immodest dress. So, anyone wearing miniskirts or flashing a bit of bare flesh could be subject to a fine. Mayor Bobbio, in conjunction with the local parish priest, Don Paulo Cecere, wants to clean up the town and bring back modesty. They are also planning to ban swearing and stop people playing football in parks.

What do you think?

Is this a good idea?
Will it help to improve the morals and behaviour of the town’s citizens?
Should it be implemented in your town? - or do you think it is silly?

Answers below please.

Stuck up a tree

2010-10-23T15:47:00.001+01:00

Usually you hear about cats getting stuck in trees, but on Cannock Chase the fire brigade thought it was a hoax when they were called out to rescue a dog from a tree.

Belle, an eight- year- old border collie, managed to climb 30’ up a horse chestnut tree and got stuck. I’ve never heard of dogs climbing trees before, so the mind boggles as to how she accomplished this amazing feat.

The poor creature was left dangling on an eight inch wide branch for six hours. Belle’s owner is a dog trainer – so hopefully she can train Bell not to go walkies up a tree next time!

http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/breaking-news/offbeat/border-collie-stuck-30ft-up-tree-14984427.html

What should writers wear?

2010-10-16T10:24:00.003+01:00

I wonder what famous writers wear when they are writing.

We had a discussion about what we wear at Uni yesterday, and most of us prefer to write in our pyjamas.
I’m a morning person so I’m usually in my dressing gown and pyjamas too. Later in the day I swap them for aged track suit bottoms and my furry No Fear fleece complete with skulls. This is no reflection on my other interests - it was reduced from £50 to £6 at the local discount sports shop and is very warm. I alternate it with a very cosy cardi that has holes and rips in. The fetching ensemble in finished with a pair of woolly socks – very necessary in the effort to keep warm. I suspect the neighbours feel sorry the ‘student’, and the post man has got used to the frightful sight when he delivers my parcels.

What do you wear when you are writing?

Howard Jacobson

2010-10-14T07:34:00.002+01:00

Congratulations to Howard Jacobson for winning the Booker prize. It is great to see a comic novel winning the prize for a change. This might be a sign of the times - that people need cheering up in this gloomy world of austerity.
Jacobson is a wonderful writer, and what’s more he once taught at our university! Read Coming from Behind if you want something to cheer yourself up, and take your mind off assignments.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2010/oct/12/howard-jacobson-the-finkler-question-booker

Mondays

2010-10-11T10:45:00.005+01:00

Which is your favourite day of the week?
I don’t have a favourite, but I always assumed that lots of people hated Mondays
The London School of Economics has been doing research on the moods of 22,000 people via an iPhone application called ‘Mappiness’ which logs the person’s mood and location.
The research showed that Tuesday was the least favourite day of the week. Probably because the effects of a nice week-end or the binge drinking have worn off and the next week-end seems a long way off.
People in Bournemouth seem to be the happiest in the country according to this research.

‘Mature’ Students

2010-10-01T15:47:00.000+01:00

Here is a bit of light entertainment about an American University, where the mature students don’t like nerdy types – Don’t worry the mature students at our Uni won’t be getting any ideas from Johnny McCocky!

John Milton’s musings

2010-09-23T21:27:00.003+01:00

Did you enjoy Paradise Lost?
Wasn’t Milton an awesome poet?
Well, Jennifer Batt, a lecturer at Oxford University, came across this poem "by Milton" in a long-forgotten volume called the Oxford and Cambridge Miscellany Poems, published in 1708, 34 years after the poet's death.

Extempore upon a Faggot

"Have you not in a Chimney seen
A Faggot which is moist and green
How coyly it receives the Heat
And at both ends do's weep and sweat?
So fares it with a tender Maid
When first upon her Back she's laid
But like dry Wood th' experienced Dame
Cracks and rejoices in the Flame."

I’ll leave you to work out what this is about.

So, Milton was clearly a bit of a lad, under his zealous Puritan façade - That is if he did really write this poem.

I must admit though, 'Extempore upon a Faggot' seems more like the sort of thing that my favourite poet the Earl of Rochester would have created !

http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2010/sep/22/john-milton-filthy-poem-oxford

‘Lefties’ are more aggressive

2010-09-20T17:34:00.003+01:00

According to psychologists at Merrimack College in Massachusetts people who are left-handed are moodier and more aggressive than right-handed folks, and they are said to be clumsier. Apparently their cerebral hemispheres are more interlinked or something, which the psychologists reckon is the reason for these traits. Or maybe left-handed people just get fed up coping with a world designed for right-handed people, but their brains are more evolved as a result. About 13% of the world’s population is left-handed.

Famous left-handers include John McEnroe, Bob Geldof (known for their strops) and Barack Obama,

David Cameron is a ‘leftie’ too.

Do you think these psychologists are right or are they spouting a load of nonsense?

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worldnews/article-1313099/Left-handed-Then-youre-likely-angry.html

Pervert of the week award

2010-09-17T12:44:00.001+01:00

This goes to Yeovil voyeur, Joshua Drummond, aged 20.
This trainee quantity surveyor from Cavalier Way hid his mobile phone in the ceiling of the ladies loo where he worked and took films of his female colleagues. He used to wait till the ladies had gone then retrieve his phone and watch the show.
Luckily one of the women spotted the phone and it was traced back to Mr. Drummond.

Drummond got off lightly (excuse the pun), and was not sent to jail, but he will be on the sex offender’s register for five years.

I must say that the workings of the male mind never cease to amaze me.

http://www.horncastlenews.co.uk/news/man_who_filmed_colleagues_in_toilet_avoids_jail_1_1161856

The Pope’s visit

2010-09-16T14:32:00.002+01:00

Are you excited about the pope’s visit or does the whole thing leave you bored rigid? Many tickets remain unsold for the pope’s venues, and there could be lots of reasons for the lack of interest, ranging from the recession to increasing secularization.

This papal visit has certainly generated a lot of mixed feelings.

First there is the problem of the sexual abuse scandals which were hushed up by the church.

Then we have Cardinal Kasper who likened Britain to a third world country, full of aggressive atheists

Then an ice cream company got into trouble with the Advertising Standards Authority for displaying posters that featured a pregnant nun eating ice cream. The company was told to remove the posters because they were offensive to the Catholic Church. The company, however, is planning to display posters with a similar ‘theme’ in time for the pope’s visit to Westminster Abby tomorrow.

As the product if a mixed marriage I had the misfortune to attend a dreadful Catholic convent school which contained some very nasty nuns and sadistic teachers. Thankfully I did not have to stay there for too long, but the place was enough to put anybody off Catholicism.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-11300552

Happy Birthday to me

2010-09-11T19:09:00.003+01:00

I won’t be celebrating with this - the world’s most expensive sandwich. It costs £110.59 (why the 59p??) and has cheddar cheese sprinkled with gold dust and white truffles.

Instead, I’ve been to Blackwell’s bookshop in Oxford and spent a lot of money on books for my next term at university – much more fun than a posh sandwich (?).
Blackwell’s is great - you can sit and read the books over a cappuccino.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-somerset-11272303

Are you proud of your dancing?

2010-09-08T14:21:00.001+01:00

According to Dr. Nick Neave an evolutionary psychologist at Northumbria University, women are more attracted to men who are ‘good’ dancers. In his study he showed women videos of men dancing. Dr. Neave found that the ‘good’ dancers were more likely to be healthier with better reproductive potential.

Humm… I don’t think women need some scientist telling them who is ‘fit’ and who isn’t, because attraction is very much in the eye of the beholder. Although women are less likely to go for men who are pissed out of their skulls dancing like deranged windmills and also the ones hopping up and down on the spot flapping their hands like constipated hens.

No, what women could do with is a scientific study that helps them to sift out the psychopaths and serial adulterers from the nice guys.

So get working on that one Dr. Neave!

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-11223473

Spats

2010-09-03T23:33:00.003+01:00

Yes my pal Tony is back in the public eye again with his magnum opus of ‘memoirs’. It comes as no surprise that he admits that he had a difficult relationship with Gordon Brown.
Tony and Gordon always appeared to be an uneasy couple in public. The tension between them showed in their strained smiles and gritted teeth. Looking back, it seems pretty obvious that they did not really like each other.
They both appear to have colossal egos and I doubt that either of them would have been willing to back down in a scrap. The image of a couple of old dogs fighting over the same bone springs to mind.

Do you think that they should have maintained a gentleman’s agreement not to slag each other off in public?

Is it best to reveal all??

Or does anybody really give a damn???

Bank Holiday Sunday

2010-08-29T15:14:00.003+01:00

Are you having a good time today folks?

What have you all been getting up to?

I’ve been watching the constant change from sun to drizzling rain, whilst editing a short story. Not the most inspiring way to spend a Bank Holiday you might think, and you would be right.
This however looks like fun.
If you like getting dirty then why not consider bog-snorkeling. The town of Llanwrtyd Wells is hosting the annual bog-snorkeling championships today. The art of bog-snorkeling seems to be to glide through the mud in fancy dress without inhaling too much of the putrid bog-water. A good dose of spirits is probably needed, especially as it is a bit chilly today.

Enjoy yourselves, whatever you are doing!

http://www.thecircumference.org/experiences/bog-snorkeling/

TV

2010-08-28T13:18:00.004+01:00

Is it just me or does anybody else think that a lot of programmes on the television are total rubbish?
It worries me that things might get worse if the Murdoch Empire becomes so powerful that it has a stranglehold over what is available - Probably bland, mind-numbing rubbish to rake in even more money for Mr. Murdoch.
In my opinion having lots of channels and choice has resulted in poorer programme quality and content.
I personally would not like to see the BBC wither and die. The BBC has produced some fantastic programmes over the years, especially the costume dramas. I thought that the recent Sherlock series was brilliant.

What programmes do you like?
Would you be happy to for the Murdoch Empire to provide all your TV programmes?

Scary Dinners

2010-08-21T10:17:00.002+01:00

Do you eat out a lot, or live in an institution where all your meals are cooked by others?
Has it ever crossed your mind that you could be very vulnerable if someone with a grudge or some other sinister motive tried to poison you?
Thankfully this kind of thing is very rare.
The pupils at Stowe School in Buckinghamshire had a lucky escape. Their carrot and coriander soup was laced with a poisonous cleaning chemical. Luckily someone spotted that there was a problem and the children were not harmed. Kitchen porter, Maxwell Cook, 57, was arrested and is pending a court hearing.

Seems a lot safer to do your own cooking!!!!

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/crime/porter-denies-public-school-poison-bid-2057950.html

Fancy a bit of excitement?

2010-08-12T16:03:00.003+01:00

If you have nothing better to do tonight, then why not stay up late and sit in the garden. You will need a comfortable deck chair - a nice alcoholic beverage or mug of cocoa would be an added bonus.
After midnight you may be rewarded with a celestial show.

No Ewar, not Anna the tennis player getting her kit off in the bedroom across the road.

No Vole, it is not Paul Uppal venturing into Wolverhampton.
No Fou, it is not Mr. Hanky,

The celestial spectacular is the Perseid meteor shower. It is supposed to be a good night to watch as the sky should be darker than usual.
Have fun!!

http://news.bbc.co.uk/local/cambridgeshire/hi/people_and_places/newsid_8906000/8906287.stm

Carbon monoxide poisoning

2010-08-10T15:26:00.003+01:00

Are you off to university this year, or leaving home and escaping from your parents?
Are you planning to move into rented accommodation?
Well, it might be a good idea to invest in a carbon monoxide detector, especially if you think you have a dodgy landlord.
I had a fascinating discussion with a British Gas engineer who told me all about unscrupulous landlords who fit shiny new gas appliances in a property in order to pass the safety inspection. Then they take out the ‘new’ appliances after the inspection has been successfully passed and install old, nasty appliances in their place. The ‘new’ appliances are then re- used in the next property that is due for inspection and so the process of substituting old for new is repeated.

There are about fifty deaths a year in the UK from carbon monoxide poisoning.
Carbon monoxide is a silent killer. All you may notice is general ill health to start with, such as headache, nausea, dizziness - vague flu-like symptoms, but without the temperature.
Left undetected it can lead to death.

A brilliant invention

2010-08-08T07:53:00.003+01:00

I was very impressed with this story.
Timothy Whitehead, a graduate from Loughborough University, has invented a bottle that can sterilize dirty water and make it safe to drink. The water bottle contains two chambers. Dirty water is put in an outer chamber and the inner chamber is plunged through it, filtering water particles as small as four microns. Once filtered, the water is sterilised by a wind-up ultraviolet bulb in a process lasting 90 seconds. A prototype was effective in killing 99.9% of bacteria and viruses. Timothy has won the UK James Dyson award for his invention, and will be one of the finalists in the global awards in October.
It is a great pity that the bottle has not been mass produced. It would be of enormous help in natural disasters such as the current floods in Pakistan.

Tim deserves to win the global prize as his invention could literally be a life-saver.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-10858815

Raymond Scott - part two

2010-08-04T07:49:00.003+01:00

On Monday I was musing about people who live a lifestyle which is not commensurate with their apparent income, and Mr. Scott provided a fine example of this, with a life of fraud, crime and debt financing his extravagant tastes.

Anonymous has posted some fascinating information about Scott on my blog, saying how Scott was a ‘character’ at school.
This set off a further train of musing that odd, eccentric or deviant people often exhibit these traits in childhood and early adulthood.

Did you have any weirdos, psychopaths, colourful or creatively eccentric characters at your school that have become notorious in later life?

Anonymous has supplied a link to Scott’s school picture. Scott is the second one from the right on the second row from the front.

Raymond Scott

2010-08-02T17:14:00.003+01:00

Do you get a bit suspicious when someone supposedly living on benefits seems to live a jet-set lifestyle and keeps a Ferrari?
Scott, 53, has never worked and he lives with his mum in her terraced house in Sunderland .Scott drank expensive champagne, bought designer clothes and regularly flew to Cuba to see his girlfriend.

So how did he do it?

Scott has just been given an eight year jail sentence for ‘handling stolen goods’. He is guilty of cultural vandalism to one of Shakespeare’s first folios. The folio in question was stolen from Durham University library in 1998. Scott had it in his possession for ten years then tried to sell it to the Folger Shakespeare Library in Washington DC for £1m. The folio had been badly damaged, in an effort to remove evidence of its provenance. Luckily the staff at the Folger were astute and called in the FBI.

Scott turned up for his month long trial at Newcastle Crown Court in a limousine with four bodyguards. One day he attended court dressed as Che Guevara, spraying the photographers with champagne. It was revealed that Scott had a string of offences for fraud and theft stretching back 32 years.

So, that is how he managed to live like an international playboy, together with his £90k debts.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2010/jul/09/raymond-scott-stolen-shakespeare-first-folio
.

Fake pound coins

2010-07-29T08:35:00.002+01:00

Have you ever had the annoying experience of trying to pay for a ticket and the machine keeps spitting out your pound coins. The chances are that the pound coins you are using are fake. I was horrified to hear that 1 in 36 pound coins currently in circulation are counterfeits. The figure is rising year on year.
It is illegal to use counterfeit pound coins so how do you spot them?
This depends on the quality of the fake.
Here are some guidelines from the Royal Mint – you can look at their website for more detailed information.
The date and design on the reverse do not match (the reverse design is changed each year) – see royal mint website for details
The lettering or inscription on the edge of the coin does not correspond to the right year.
The milled edge is poorly defined and the lettering is uneven in depth, spacing or is poorly formed. The obverse and reverse designs are not as sharp or well defined.
Where the coin should have been in circulation for some time, the colouring appears more shiny and golden and the coin shows no sign of age.
The colour of the coin does not match genuine coins.
The orientation of the obverse and reverse designs is not in line.

So next time you hold up the queue at a ticket machine as it spits out your pound coins you can thank the scumbags who are making the fakes!

http://www.royalmint.com/Corporate/facts/CounterfeitPoundCoins.aspx

Toxic mothers

2010-07-27T16:42:00.004+01:00

Do you have a loving mother? Well, if you do, then you are very lucky. You are likely to have grown up with good self esteem and you are likely to be good at handling the stresses of life.
If a mother is emotionally cold or hostile, then a child more likely to grow up suffering from anxiety and have a poor self image.

These findings came from a study carried out at Rhode Island over a thirty year period. The researchers studied interactions between mothers and babies and interviewed the ‘babies’ again thirty years later to see how they had turned out. The results were published in the Journal of Epidemiology and Community Health.

Many people have the misfortune to have odd mothers, but hostile, critical mothers who don’t show their children that they love or want them do a lot of damage.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-10759511

Britain’s Got Talent vs. British heroes

2010-07-24T12:08:00.003+01:00

I’ve been in France – hence the lack of blog postings for a while. I got back to see these two items in the news. One was about a woman, Emma Amelia Pearl Czikai, who claimed she had been humiliated by Simon Cowell and was suing him for £2.5 million for the distress she suffered as a result of his comments about her on the show. I saw a clip of Emma Amelia Pearl Czikai ‘singing’ and it was awful (although there is another clip of her on YouTube in which her singing is a lot better). Everyone knows that Simon Cowell is very forthright with his opinions, but demanding compensation of £2.5 million for what was a truthful opinion, is in my opinion, barmy.

Contrast her ridiculous demands with the treatment of brave soldier Aron Shelton by the benefits agency. He lost his £180 p.m. mobility allowance after honestly stating on his claim form that he could walk 400 metres with his prosthetic leg. That is, on a good day. He is in constant pain and the effort leaves him wiped out. He saw his friend killed in action and has clearly suffered a great deal to help his country. I hope that he gets his mobility benefit back, as he clearly needs it.

As for the operatic prima donna- I hope her extortionate claim is laughed out of court.

Emma Amelia Pearl Czikai - Britains Got Talent 2009 Ep 5
Uploaded by metora83. - Classic TV and last night's shows, online.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1297048/Limbless-soldier-loses-benefits-walking-400-metres-prosthetic-leg.html
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1296543/Britains-Got-Talent-took-away-dignity-Disabled-contestant-sues-Cowell-discrimination.html

Bad teachers

2010-07-12T09:56:00.003+01:00

Did you have any bad or useless teachers at your school?
Did the bad teacher affect your grades or sabotage your career plans?

Zenna Atknis, the chair of Ofsted, does not think it matters too much if a school has bad teachers. She thinks it can help people cope with life.

Do you think that is a valid reason for people having to put up with bad teachers?

We had one notoriously bad teacher at our school, called ‘Zombie’, who taught French. That was not his real name, but the name we called him behind his back. He was very timid, despite his vast stature, and he was unbearably boring .I don’t think anyone learnt anything in his lessons because people were too busy tormenting him. Those of us who wanted to learn could not hear the lesson above the din of mockery and disruption.
We also had a maths teacher who was an aggressive psychopath, with a volatile temper. His lessons were terrifying ordeals involving routine humiliation, and the hurling of homework books at the ignorant. Needless to say I am completely maths phobic thanks to him.
Then there was the PE master who thought he was God’s gift… but that’s another story…

Meanwhile in Essex, the children at one school have been having sex education lessons from a teacher who leads a double life. In his spare time he is Johnny Anglais - porn star, pictured above.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/education/10590460.stm

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/3049825/Im-a-teacher-and-a-porn-star.html

Paul the psychic octopus

2010-07-09T16:03:00.002+01:00

I have been fascinated with Paul the octopus. He is the most interesting thing about the World Cup.
So far he has accurately predicted all the German results in this tournament.
But poor Paul has had death threats from disgruntled fans, who want to boil him and eat him.

Paul has predicted that Spain will win on Sunday (and that Germany will come third in the play-offs).
Now Paul has a rival in the prediction business – a parakeet from Singapore has predicted that Holland will win instead.

We will have to wait till Sunday to find out who is right – Will it be Paul or the parakeet?????

Manhunt

2010-07-08T13:39:00.003+01:00

Have you been watching the police manhunt for Raoul Moat?
It is only a few weeks since the murdering rampage by Derrick Bird, and here we are again with another murderer on the run. I hope these murderers have not set a precedent for a proliferation of copy-cat killings by people who ‘snap’/ hate their mothers/ have been jilted/ got out of bed on the wrong side that morning etc etc. England is starting to feel like the Wild West, and it is very scary.

Moat’s mother has disowned him, which may be an indication of the awfulness of his personality and behaviour prior to this atrocity.

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/3045636/Raoul-Moats-mother-Josephine-Healy-Youre-better-off-dead-son.html

Paul’s predictions

2010-07-07T09:35:00.001+01:00

Are you watching the football match tonight?
I’m not. I’m going out.
But if you are interested then Paul the psychic octopus at the Oberhausen Sea Life Centre has predicted a win for Spain.
I find the antics of the octopus far more interesting than the football, although the German players have been very impressive on the pitch.

Will Paul be right again, or are his psychic powers waning??
We will know tonight.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/10521867.stm

Tough times for graduates

2010-07-06T10:52:00.002+01:00

A poll of employers has revealed today that due to a shortage of jobs there are as many as seventy graduates chasing each job vacancy. Employers are also demanding a 2.1 degree as a minimum requirement.

I was annoyed when a man on TV this morning said that the job problem for graduates was the fault of people doing too many ‘soft’ degrees like the one I’m doing and ‘media studies’. He also said that students should be made to do ‘proper A levels’ and only people wanting to enter a profession should be allowed to study at university. Everyone else should consider apprenticeships and vocational qualifications.

Do you think he has a point?

Would the world be a better place without humanities degrees?

http://www.guardian.co.uk/education/2010/jul/06/graduates-face-tougher-jobs-fight

Paul the octopus got it right!

2010-06-28T09:41:00.003+01:00

What did you think of the England team's ‘performance’ yesterday?

There are no excuses - they were appalling.
The players did not show any team spirit, or national pride.

They are a disgrace to all the people who wasted their time and money travelling to South Africa to support them.

How can you have a decent team when the members are overpaid, overhyped tabloid celebs, more interested in the trappings of wealth than doing a good job?

Would it help to have a manager who was from England?
Was the fault Capello’s? Is he a useless manager? He certainly seems to have communication difficulties, so perhaps the ‘team’ struggled to understand what he wanted them to do.

What do you think?

Octopus predicts football results

2010-06-26T09:26:00.003+01:00

Do you have a psychic pet?
The Germans believe that they have.

Here is Paul, the psychic octopus who can predict football results.
Paul lives at the Oberhausen Sea Life Aquarium in Germany.
So far Paul has accurately predicted the results for the German football team in the World Cup.

Sadly for England fans, Paul has predicted that Germany will win tomorrow.

What has happened to our gnomes?

2010-06-19T08:13:00.002+01:00

The gnome used to be an important design feature in traditional British gardens. But times have changed and so have people’s tastes. The craze for wind chimes and low maintenance has lead to gardens becoming boring.
Gnomes with plump rosy cheeks and red pointy hats are no longer to be seen dipping their little rods into ornamental fish ponds.

Sad isn’t it?

Have you ever wondered where all the gnomes have gone?
The answer is – the tip. Best place for them you might think.
But Neil Goode from Birmingham has been busy rescuing discarded gnomes from a recycling centre, and has given them a new lease of life, by repainting them in World Cup colours.

Once the World Cup is over I suspect the poor gnomes will find themselves back on the scrap heap, unloved and unwanted.

As for the England team, judging by yesterday’s appalling performance, they will be too.

It is about time people questioned the obscene amounts of money paid to football players - all they do is fill the tabloids with their lavish lifestyles and wanton behaviour.

You can see his gnomes on the link below.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/10351869.stm

Books…

2010-06-18T08:53:00.001+01:00

Do you like books?

I expect most of you do. I’m a student and I seem to spend more money on books than anything else.
In these cash strapped times, with the prospect of swingeing cuts under the ConDems, please don’t be tempted to emulate this Cambridge graduate, if you are short of cash for textbooks.
This villain, William Jacques, 41, stole £40,000 worth of rare books from the Royal Horticultural Society’s library, by smuggling them out under his tweed jacket. He also used a false name. The staff at the library became suspicious when he was noted to leave the library, on a regular basis with his ‘left arm held stiffly to his side.’

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1286869/Cambridge-graduate-stole-rare-books-worth-40-000-hiding-tweed-jacket.html

Ummm….Let me take down your particulars????

2010-06-16T15:09:00.006+01:00

How would you fancy a quickie in the back of the panda car with this hunk?

Jamie Slater, 33, a corrupt cop from Wales, was jailed for giving vulnerable female motorists, who had committed minor offences, the choice of prosecution, or sex.
Sadly some of his victims chose the latter and ended up becoming his panda car concubines.
The married father of two, was rumbled when one of his victims reported him after is sexual demands became ‘more unusual’.

The satyr of Port Talbot said in his defence: ‘I just wanted to be liked.’

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1286803/Pc-jailed-having-sex-women-exchange-letting-driving-offences.html

Balls

2010-06-14T09:48:00.002+01:00

Bet you didn’t know that the players at the World Cup have special balls.
Yes – these balls were designed by Dr. Andy Harland at the University of Loughborough. He spent four years researching footballs and designed ‘the roundest ball ever’, designed to maximize a player's skills.
The balls have been named ‘Jabulani’ which means ‘celebrate’ in Zulu.

Despite the special balls, I don’t think that the England team has anything to celebrate!

Ahhhh…..

2010-06-13T12:45:00.001+01:00

If you are gutted after yesterday’s football fiasco from our useless team, cheer yourselves up with Greenland’s singing sensation.
This is Simon Lynge, the singing Eskimo. He is very cute and has a lovely American accent.

Are you ready for tonight?

2010-06-12T10:19:00.003+01:00

The shops are groaning with merchandise sporting the England logo. In one supermarket I spotted garden chairs with covers that had the England flag all over them. Beer and barbecue meat sales have rocketed.
If you are a learner driver, then venture out tonight at 7.30, you can guarantee that the roads will be deserted, as the rest of the population settle down to watch THE MATCH.

Even I might be tempted to watch, even though I am not a football fan, and have a moral aversion to grossly overpaid football ‘celebs’.
The USA beat England one-nil last time they met in 1950. Will it be a repeat performance?

Will you be able to cope with all this excitement?

Yawn

2010-06-10T08:44:00.001+01:00

Are you looking forward to Saturday?
Have you rushed out to buy England flags and bunting?
Even ‘call me Dave’ will be flying the flag over number 10 – not in some declaration of independence for England, but to support our overpaid, overhyped useless football team.
One football fan has covered his mum’s sitting room floor with TURF. He said his mum did not know about it – but she will do soon with all the publicity he is getting!
What are you planning to do to celebrate the world cup?

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1284596/Dan-Taylor-lays-100sq-ft-turf-living-room-celebrate-World-Cup.html

Are you into herpetology?

2010-06-09T16:30:00.001+01:00

No…this is not some sort of dubious or deviant activity, it is the study of reptiles. Personally I hate reptiles, and was somewhat delighted today to hear that the global snake population is in decline. Usually if a snake rears its ugly head on the TV I have to dive for cover as I am totally snake phobic, and the sight of one makes me feel sick.
If you like snakes, then you might be saddened by the news that scientists have discovered that many snakes are on their way out.

From an environmental point of view, however, it is tragic. It is another example of animals disappearing due to global climate and environmental changes, no doubt caused by greedy capitalists.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/environment/2010/jun/09/scientists-alarm-snakes

Do you like having your photograph taken?

2010-06-07T11:06:00.002+01:00

I don’t - being a minger I hate having my photograph taken. If anyone points a camera in my direction I turn into an exhibit in a gargoyle competition.
Some of my readers are stunning and attractive, so you can skip the next bit.
For those of you destined to become celebs, needing advice on how to pose on the red carpet at the Oscars or baftas, here are some tricks for looking good for the press:

Take a deep breath and exhale to appear relaxed.
Head up as if someone is pulling the crown of your head to the sky.
Chin ever so slightly up and forward to alleviate a double chin– not too much or you'll get a nostril shot.
Smile from your lower mouth only– eyes won't squint and wrinkles won't appear.
Know the best side of your face and position it to the camera.
Shoulders back.
Inside shoulder angled away from the camera–this sets the ¾ frame for the rest of you to appear slimmer.
Inside arm on upper hip to create shape and have your waist appear smaller.
Outside arm, straight and slightly away from your body to avoid ruining the line of your outfit and have your upper body appear leaner.
Hand in a semi-open pretty shape with fingers slightly apart. Tummy tight.
Hips forward and continue to be on a ¾ angle way from the camera to look slimmer.
Outside leg crossed over to the inside with foot pointed inward to create an elongated and slim leg. You are not putting any weight on this foot so leg muscles look lean.
Inside leg is your support. Once it is placed on your mark, everything will fall in place from there.

P.S. I think this sounds far too complicated – probably easier to avoid cameras altogether or just make sure you never become famous.

http://www.focusonstyle.com/Blog/pose-like-a-celebrity-red-carpet-posing-tips-elle-macpherson

Guns

2010-06-03T09:09:00.003+01:00

My thoughts are with the people of West Cumbria following yesterday’s atrocities. They have also had to cope with the recent coach crash and the floods.
The police are now trying to work out why Derrick Bird did it. He shot his brother and a solicitor, together with innocent members of the public who were randomly mown down. Perhaps Bird had been stewing over a festering grudge and flipped.

Derrick Bird’s rampage highlights once again the evils of gun ownership. In 1987 Michael Ryan killed 16 people in Hungerford. In 1996 Thomas Hamilton killed 16 children and a teacher in Dunblane. Both of them were loners who had been harbouring a lot of pent up hatred against humanity.

In my opinion guns should be banned.

It seems impossible to predict who is ‘safe’ to own guns. Anyone can become mentally ill, paranoid or angry. Psychopaths are notorious for turning on the charm and fooling the authorities. Children have accidently shot themselves when parents have left loaded guns lying around.

So, the safest course of action would be to ban public gun ownership. It might help to reduce the probability of tragedies like Derrick Bird's rampage.

Drink

2010-06-02T08:39:00.003+01:00

Do you like alcohol? – My favourite comedy character father Jack certainly does. The down-side is the hangover though. I ended up with a horrible hangover after a family wedding on Saturday – so I can sympathize with any one feeling a bit fragile from the effects of drink.
It is estimated that half a million people go to work every day with hangovers. The average employee has a hangover three times a month, and one in ten people have to go home early because they feel a bit poorly. This is bound to get a lot worse during the World Cup.
Despite these statistics nine out of ten people felt it was wrong to be hung-over at work.

Do you think it is OK for people to be hung-over at work, especially during the World Cup, or do you think it is wrong?